Double Darn, I have to quit.

No, not blogging.  I resigned from a client who needs someone like me and a volunteer position that I just can’t do anymore.  The client is very small and struggling and I feel like a total heel having to quit.  But, with my current travel schedule and work load, I just can’t get there.  Unfortunately, it’s not a client I can take care of remotely because they don’t have that kind of infrastructure in place and they can’t afford to buy it right now. 

The volunteer position is even trickier because I was elected to the position.  But, with everything going on, I’m doing a lousy job and probably hurting their reputation.  Which I would never ever want to do.  So, after many months of trying to tell myself I could do it and failing, and knashing my teeth and pulling my hair and not getting any writing done because I feel so damn guilty that I still have volunteer work to do, I quit.

But damn, damn double darn I HATE to quit.  I pride myself on finishing what I start and this feels like crap.   Usually, when I have to resign from a client I’ve interviewed and hired my replacement and I feel comfortable walking away because the client will be taken care of as well I could have taken care of them.  It’s a wonderful feeling to have helped get a client to the point where they don’t need me anymore.  Which sounds disingenuous, but that’s what I do. I get them off the ground and fix their policies and procedures and help them get to be successful enough to need someone like me full-time.  This keeps new challenges in my life, which I thrive on.

But, not this time.  And for two at once!!

Damn.  Darn. Crap.

I hate this.