Man Plan '09. The Time is Now!

Since I started dating again, it’s kind of amazing how many women I’ve met who are also paddling up the same river. A couple of weeks ago, I went to dinner with the Lovely Meredith from San Francisco and she told me about a pact she and a bunch of her single girlfriends have made. They’re calling it Man Plan ‘09. After hearing about it, I jumped on board.

Here’s the deal: We’re all tired of either being alone, serial dating, or dating guys who, let’s face it, just aren’t that into us. We’ve all decided it’s time to find our person. Man Plan ‘09 is here to change that.

So, what are the rules?

Well, lovelies, the rules are simple. We’re looking for guys who:

1. First and foremost, are AVAILABLE.
2. Who are looking for a relationship too.

Now, I said the rules were simple, but only on the surface. In reality, the rules are actually quite difficult. Let’s take the first one: He must be AVAILABLE. We’re talking about more than just not having plans on the weekends. Nope, we’re talking about much, much more than that.
We’re talking about AVAILABLE — in every sense of the word. That means:

-No workaholics. Or, as my friend the Lovely Miss Tina said: no more of a workaholic than YOU.

-Not in a relationship. Now, it would seem like this would go without saying, but saying it I am because some guys — not those who are eligible for Man Plan ‘09, but some guys — can be very slippery suckers about this. As you would expect, no relationship means that no ex-girlfriends are calling him and he’s not calling any ex-girlfriends. But, it also means:

-No momma’s boys.

-No one who wants to hang with the guys all day Sunday EVERY Sunday.

-No guys who have a deep and meaningful relationship with their Apple Macbooks, or pentium processors.

-No guys who have filled up each and every night with soccer teams, bowling teams, Ultimate Frisbee, running clubs, etc.

In other words, AVAILABLE to spend time with YOU:

-Lives in the same city, or no more than an hour away. Because, come on, more than an hour is a day trip – NOT a relationship.

-If he has kids, and once you’re past twenty-five many men do, then he still has time for you separate from the kids. And I’m talking quality time, Ladies! Not any of this one weekend a month from 2-4pm on Saturday crap.

-Any other way that prevents him from spending quality time getting to know YOU.

Okay, on to the next rule: A guy who is looking for a relationship too. I’ve had several of my sisters in the dating game insist that no guy is looking for a relationship. Well, I reject that premise, my lovelies, and I’ll tell you why. The next time you’re at the mall, the grocery store, the gas pump, or the movie theater take a gander around at how many men are there alone? As we all know, because we’re all scoping out a guys left hand, not too darn many.

Now, some women will insist that the only reason they aren’t alone is that the only way to get consistent nookie is to be in a relationship, but I disagree. Not that I’m disagreeing that guys like consistent nookie, that would be silly. Hecky durns, I would assert that we all like consistent nookie! But, that’s a blog for another day.

No, from what I’ve observed, and the guys I’ve spoken with, a guy wants a relationship — not just nookie, but a relationship— just as much as we do. That’s why you see so many couples. Not because one has tricked or trapped the other, but because they both want to be there.

And that, Ladies, is the guy we’re looking for! The guy who WANTS to be there. He’s out there. The problem, as I’ve said before, is that you gotta kiss a lotta frogs to find your Person. Oh, and as an aside, be nice when throwing those frogs back. One girl’s frog is another girl’s Person. Let’s try not to do any lasting damage to the poor froggies, okay? We want them to keep kissin’ too!

Man Plan ‘09. The Next Frontier!